I am so excited that you are almost here! Your "due date" is August 27th (just two weeks away!) but who knows when you will actually come. On the one hand I am so excited to meet you and see what you look like and see what your disposition is, but on the other, I have a lot of things to get done before you arrive (buy diapers, make your bed, wash your clothes, buy my birth supplies, etc). I was going to get all of that done this past weekend but I caught a cold and then your dad went to a youth camp so I haven't had a chance yet.
This pregnancy has probably been my hardest due to life circumstances (which still hasn't been too bad, I'm a lucky one in pregnancy). I got in a car accident with your aunt Jessica that resulted in some minor physical injuries like lots of headaches and some post traumatic stress and depression afterwards. We moved (which is always a little stressful!) from a cute condo that one of Adelaide's friends called our "treehouse" to a great four bedroom house with a little yard for you and the kids to run around in. Someone I consider to be a friend, Kate Kelly, has been excommunicated for following her heart and trying to make our church a more equal place for women, leaving me feeling quite discouraged about our church. Some friends and family have "unfriended" me for sharing my views and my heart and I would be lying if I said it didn't hurt. There have been a few other things that have been hard for me during this pregnancy that I don't want to write about now, but I just want you to know that when I've been feeling down I try to instead think of you, and the thought of you always makes me feel happy and at peace. To borrow imagery from Maya Angelou, you have been a rainbow to me on my cloudy days.
There has also been a lot of happiness during your pregnancy. I planted my first real garden (and it is doing awesome!) Maverick is mostly potty-trained (it is nice to have a little break from poopy diapers before you get here). Aunt Jessica, aunt Meg and Mimi Michelle threw me an adorable baby shower in your honor where you were gifted the most adorable clothes, blankets and everyone helped to make you an alphabet block set. It was so nice to spend a night with so many women that I love and look up to. I have been growing my food blog, and having a great time cooking new meals for our family. I found an amazing midwife, Judy, to help bring you into the world. We went camping in Yosemite. We took lots of trips to the beach and the boardwalk. Aunt Meg and Benj brought a baby cousin into the world, Vera, and I was honored to be able to be there for her birth. Aunt Jessica moved in with us. I had a ten year graduation anniversary trip with some of my best girlfriends to Redondo beach. I have fallen in love with yoga and swimming. Adelaide was in her first dance recital. Maverick has begun really talking and by the sound of it will never stop. We have taken some day trips to places like Fairyland, San Francisco and Monterey. You dad has been helping me make the house the way we want it as nesting has kicked in and we have a nightly ritual of watching Seinfeld or Suits before bed. I get a little intense during pregnancy and your dad seems to always know how to help me chill out and smile.
So, as you can see, your pregnancy has been a time of ups and downs, that is just life I guess. Through it all I have often thought of the lyrics to the song "I Get to be the One" by JJ Heller and I just can't express how excited I am to be your mom:
Well hello,
Little baby.
Your eyes have never seen the sun
You should know
Little baby
That I am the lucky one
I get to be the one to hold your hand
I get to be the one.
Through birthdays and broken bones
I'll be there to watch you grow
I get to be the one.
Don't feel alone now,Little baby.
Do you hear me singing you a song
I can't wait to show you
Little baby
How to crawl
How to walk
And how to run
I get to be the one to hold your hand
I get to be the one.
Through birthdays and broken bones
I'll be there to watch you grow
I get to be the one.
How does someone so small
Hold my heart so tightly
I don't even know you
I love you completely
I get to be the one to hold your hand
I get to be the one.
Through birthdays and broken bones
I'll be there to watch you grow
I get to be the one to hold your hand
I get to be the one.
Through birthdays and broken bones
I'll be there to watch you grow
I get to be the one.
This was on Mother's Day. I love being a mom to Mav and Adelaide and can't wait to be yours too.
I love you completely. XOXO
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